A short time ago a friend of mine sent me a story about the late General Black Jack Pershing and how he handled a terrorist situation just before the start of World War 1. His methods were quite simple but effective in that knowing Muslims considered pigs as vile, filthy creatures and having any contact with a pig would result in them being "barred from paradise and doomed to hell". So, he slaughtered 2 pigs in from of the captured terrorists, dipped bullets in the pigs blood and the shot 49 of the 50 captured fun seekers. The 50Th he turned loose knowing he would go back to his friends and relay the horrible display he had witnessed and thereby eliminating any further terrorist acts. Strangely this got me thinking!
While watching the Military channel the other night I had a vision. Well, it was more of a perverted and vile thought but at least this one was constructive! Why not take a few KC130's outfitted with Ariel Refueling systems and fill them with pig blood, fat and any other assorted porcine pudding (hell we could even juice a pig in an industrial size juicer for that fact!) and do a few "carpet bombing" missions over hostile terrorist infested territory and, instead of dropping bombs, give them a nice saturation of pig swill! Think about what you are doing here! First, NO KILLINGS! No one will die as a result of this hog storm! Secondly, they can't hide from it! Sooner or later these suicide bomber wannabes will have to step on the ground that has been soiled by pig parts, soiling their souls thus forcing them to become unable to go to Paradise! This will surely reduce the number of potential suicide bombers and, maybe, cut down on their will to die and become a martyr. Can't be a martyr if your covered in pig punch!!! Heck, this might be the only way to finally achieve Peace in the middle east! Israelis would be able to walk down the streets of Tehran without a care in the world we wouldn't have to worry about Abdul Muhammad Allah Al Frankenfurter getting testy on any airplanes! In fact if something went wrong on a airplane these pork wine soiled boneheads will do anything they can to keep FROM dieing!
Anyways, just a thought!
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
B+ for Obama???
We all know that recently President Obama gave himself a grade of B+ for his first 11 months in office. Of course we all know that Obama inherited a mess from the Bush Administration and every Democrat worth his weight in manure has pounded that message down our throats since Election day! I used to consider myself a Democrat but the more I looked at some of the lunacy taking place within the party's ranks my view of the Democratic party, as well as the US, started to change (naming that nut job Howard Dean as DNC chair didn't help much either!) Now that I have embraced more Conservative views I feel that I can see the issues from both sides with more clarity than before and, to be honest, a B+ grade for the President is as ridiculous a notion as giving him the Nobel Prize!
First off I can't see what he has actually done! If you count his continuous campaigning and his apology tour of the world then I guess he has accomplished a great deal. He has given the United Autoworkers Union ownership status in two of the countries major car manufacturers concreting my position of NEVER buying a GM or Chrysler product ever again! Is he too stupid to realize that the UAW is the leading cause of these companies downfalls? I mean I'm all for fair wages but paying someone $48/hr to sweep a floor is a bit ridiculous!
Secondly, explain to me how we are supposed to "spend" our way out of recession?
Go ahead, I'll wait!
Spending your way OUT of debt is probably not the most prudent way of handling your fiscal woes. We have spent our way INTO debt! Continued spending will lead to MORE DEBT and eventually more taxes.
Next, security. We have none! Plain and simple! Not at the borders, not in airplanes, and definitely not financially and the latest story about the Nigerian airplane bomber proves that this country is taking a weaker stance on National Security than ever before and that moronic excuse for a living organism Janet Napolitano had the balls (I think shes a dude anyway) to say the System WORKED??? Well, if the system consists of making sure there is a Danish citizen with a fire extinguisher on board then I guess she's got a point!
Finally, Health Care. Yes, Obama is on the path to ruin this as well! Actually the Democrat controlled Congress is going to do this for him. See, Obama knows he is not smart enough to draft any kind of Health Care reform legislation on his own as it would interfere with his golf game, vacations or date night with his wife. Plus, Community Organizers really don't do anything themselves. They delegate the work and then take credit for it. So for now I'll leave Obama alone for this, but if he signs any Health Care Reform legislation into law his ass will take the blame!
So, all in all, if you really want to grade Obama's performance in his first year you have to ask yourself "well, what did he really do?" and after you finish scratching your head because you can't really nail down one thing just remember back when you were in school and you didn't finish an assignment or didn't complete a course. I'll bet your grade was a big fat ZERO!!!
In the immortal words of Dean Wormer from the classic movie Animal House:
"0.0. All courses incomplete!"
First off I can't see what he has actually done! If you count his continuous campaigning and his apology tour of the world then I guess he has accomplished a great deal. He has given the United Autoworkers Union ownership status in two of the countries major car manufacturers concreting my position of NEVER buying a GM or Chrysler product ever again! Is he too stupid to realize that the UAW is the leading cause of these companies downfalls? I mean I'm all for fair wages but paying someone $48/hr to sweep a floor is a bit ridiculous!
Secondly, explain to me how we are supposed to "spend" our way out of recession?
Go ahead, I'll wait!
Spending your way OUT of debt is probably not the most prudent way of handling your fiscal woes. We have spent our way INTO debt! Continued spending will lead to MORE DEBT and eventually more taxes.
Next, security. We have none! Plain and simple! Not at the borders, not in airplanes, and definitely not financially and the latest story about the Nigerian airplane bomber proves that this country is taking a weaker stance on National Security than ever before and that moronic excuse for a living organism Janet Napolitano had the balls (I think shes a dude anyway) to say the System WORKED??? Well, if the system consists of making sure there is a Danish citizen with a fire extinguisher on board then I guess she's got a point!
Finally, Health Care. Yes, Obama is on the path to ruin this as well! Actually the Democrat controlled Congress is going to do this for him. See, Obama knows he is not smart enough to draft any kind of Health Care reform legislation on his own as it would interfere with his golf game, vacations or date night with his wife. Plus, Community Organizers really don't do anything themselves. They delegate the work and then take credit for it. So for now I'll leave Obama alone for this, but if he signs any Health Care Reform legislation into law his ass will take the blame!
So, all in all, if you really want to grade Obama's performance in his first year you have to ask yourself "well, what did he really do?" and after you finish scratching your head because you can't really nail down one thing just remember back when you were in school and you didn't finish an assignment or didn't complete a course. I'll bet your grade was a big fat ZERO!!!
In the immortal words of Dean Wormer from the classic movie Animal House:
"0.0. All courses incomplete!"
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